Tethered to the Wall, a medical tale with weirdly Seussical elements

So, over the past few months, I’ve been having what my doctors assumed were seizures that caused blackouts and a weird time period of about an hour where I had am’nesia.

In order to prove or disprove(since most of my medical history requires ruling out rather than ruling in), my doctors checked me into the 24 hour EMU, epilepsy monitoring unit.

Silly me, I must watch too much SciFi, I envisioned a special room where they could read the monitors wirelessly. So I resigned myself to 3-5 days with electrodes glued to my head, stuck to my head. Friends, that would have been lovely. No, they use an industrial epoxy to glue on the electrodes, pull all the cords through a sock on your head and tether you to to the wall.

Guess what, these cords are heavy and the bathroom is at the end of the leash and a camera is on you constantly. I may have looked like a Seuss character, but my world felt a little more Clockwork Orange. Kubrick does Dr. Seuss? Doesn’t compute does it?

Fortunately I had an episode the next morning, while the doctors were in the room, and no one noticed. This concerns me, obviously I’ve mastered the “everything is fine” modus operandi, but I would prefer not to lose bits of my life an hour at a time. The doctors ruled out seizures and turned me loose less than 24 hours after check-in. FYI, it takes much longer than 24 hours to get the epoxy out of your hair. In case you are contemplating the look for Halloween.

So on we go, remembering most hours and trying to live as normally as possible.

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2 thoughts on “Tethered to the Wall, a medical tale with weirdly Seussical elements

  1. I did a sleep study at Porter. Full EEG wiring too, nice queen bed but had to call for help to disconnect every bathroom visit too. I was lucky, my nightly wiggles were not seizures or restless legs.
    I hope there is an answer for yours and treatment that is tolerable. I’m on Keppra. I ran out last night, hoped I would not wake up in an ambulance again! It took a few phone calls and a couple trips to the pharmacy to get a new supply. I hope you don’t have to take it with all your other meds!

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